[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
it be."
But Musa was
had been
young, supremely talented, confident, and he could not believe I had beaten
him. Not a man who had dishonored himself.
After a moment, Alric asked, "Will you answer a question?"
I couldn't figure out why he felt he had to ask permission. "Sure."
"What will you do if Delilah is dead?"
Oh. Now I knew why.
"Tiger?"
"I haven't thought about it."
My tone did not dissuade him from further inquiry. "Not ever?"
"No."
"Why not?"
I hitched myself up on an elbow and scowled at him. "What kind of a
conversation is this?
How about I ask you if you've ever thought about what you'd do if Lena died?"
"I have. I do. Every time she goes into labor."
I blinked. It's not the sort of thing men speak about very often, if at all.
"Well, I suppose that's a risk you have to take if you're going to have kids."
Which was a pretty lame comment, but I didn't know what else to say. I flopped
back down on my blanket. Since he'd brought it up "So, what would you do if
Lena died?"
"I have three daughters to care for. That is what I'd do."
"As a sword-dancer?"
"Oh, no. I would have to find another life. Something with no travel involved,
so I would be there for my girls." He spoke so matter-of-factly about giving
up the life he had always wanted. Maybe that's what happened when you got
married and had kids. Gave things up. No wonder I didn't want any.
"As you have no children," Alric said, "what will you do if Del is dead?"
I really didn't want to walk this particular conversational road. Especially
when I had no idea where or how she was. "Go on," I replied briefly.
"Doing what? You can't accept dances anymore."
"I own one-third of a cantina."
Alric turned to stare at me incredulously. "You'd spend the rest of your days
serving liquor and wine-girls?"
"No," I replied crossly. "I mean I'd collect my share of profits. They'd be
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enough to live on even if I can't dance. But it doesn't really matter, because
I have plans."
"What plans?"
"Alimat fell years ago. The shodo died. There hasn't been one since then at
least, not of his ability." I raised my hands into the air, inspecting them.
"Even if I hadn't declared elaii-ali-ma, I'm a little bit hampered as a
sword-dancer. So I thought I'd take a whack at being a shodo."
"You? A teacher?"
I scowled at him, lowering my hands. "Why does everyone always sound so
surprised?"
Alric examined my expression. "Because you are not in general known for your
patience, Tiger. And those who have a particularly rare gift for something in
your case, sword-dancing often make the worst teachers. They can't teach what
comes to them naturally and unbidden."
"How do you know I can't?"
"Tell me how you defeated Musa."
"I just beat him."
"See?"
"Come on, Alric! Do you want me to give you a blow-by-blow description? You
were there."
"How do you know precisely where a man will be in the circle, Tiger? How do
you know what move he will make before he knows?" He grinned as I stared at
him in surprise. "Yes. I
have seen it in you. As I saw it on Staal-Ysta, in one of the sword-singers
there. I asked him once. He couldn't tell me. He said he simply knew. He saw
it in his head."
"Time just slows." It was the first time I had ever spoken of it to anyone. It
sounded ridiculous. And impossible.
Alric sighed. "You can't teach that, Tiger."
It stung. "You don't know. I might be able to."
The big Northerner snorted. Then he rolled over, displaying a broad back. Such
faith he had in me.
But maybe he was right. Maybe I couldn't teach anyone anything. I just didn't
know what else I might do.
I stared into the deepening sky, watching the stars emerge out of daylight
into darkness.
Firelight flickered at ground level, illuminating soil and sand, the dark,
angular faces of
Southron travelers. The aroma of mutton and sausage drifted our way. I heard
quiet murmurings in several dialects, laughter, a child crying, and a faint,
yearning melody sung softly by a woman.
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ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
Bascha, I said, please don't be dead.
* * *
I awoke to the sound of a baby screaming. At first I tried to block it out by
pulling a corner of the blanket over my head, but it didn't help. Eventually I
gave up, squinted out at the early morning sun, then pushed myself upright.
Musa may have landed only one minor blow, but the dance alone had resulted in
sore muscles.
I got up slowly, swearing quietly under my breath. By the time I was standing,
I realized
Alric was already up. In fact, he'd taken the horses off for watering. I was [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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it be."
But Musa was
had been
young, supremely talented, confident, and he could not believe I had beaten
him. Not a man who had dishonored himself.
After a moment, Alric asked, "Will you answer a question?"
I couldn't figure out why he felt he had to ask permission. "Sure."
"What will you do if Delilah is dead?"
Oh. Now I knew why.
"Tiger?"
"I haven't thought about it."
My tone did not dissuade him from further inquiry. "Not ever?"
"No."
"Why not?"
I hitched myself up on an elbow and scowled at him. "What kind of a
conversation is this?
How about I ask you if you've ever thought about what you'd do if Lena died?"
"I have. I do. Every time she goes into labor."
I blinked. It's not the sort of thing men speak about very often, if at all.
"Well, I suppose that's a risk you have to take if you're going to have kids."
Which was a pretty lame comment, but I didn't know what else to say. I flopped
back down on my blanket. Since he'd brought it up "So, what would you do if
Lena died?"
"I have three daughters to care for. That is what I'd do."
"As a sword-dancer?"
"Oh, no. I would have to find another life. Something with no travel involved,
so I would be there for my girls." He spoke so matter-of-factly about giving
up the life he had always wanted. Maybe that's what happened when you got
married and had kids. Gave things up. No wonder I didn't want any.
"As you have no children," Alric said, "what will you do if Del is dead?"
I really didn't want to walk this particular conversational road. Especially
when I had no idea where or how she was. "Go on," I replied briefly.
"Doing what? You can't accept dances anymore."
"I own one-third of a cantina."
Alric turned to stare at me incredulously. "You'd spend the rest of your days
serving liquor and wine-girls?"
"No," I replied crossly. "I mean I'd collect my share of profits. They'd be
Page 109
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
enough to live on even if I can't dance. But it doesn't really matter, because
I have plans."
"What plans?"
"Alimat fell years ago. The shodo died. There hasn't been one since then at
least, not of his ability." I raised my hands into the air, inspecting them.
"Even if I hadn't declared elaii-ali-ma, I'm a little bit hampered as a
sword-dancer. So I thought I'd take a whack at being a shodo."
"You? A teacher?"
I scowled at him, lowering my hands. "Why does everyone always sound so
surprised?"
Alric examined my expression. "Because you are not in general known for your
patience, Tiger. And those who have a particularly rare gift for something in
your case, sword-dancing often make the worst teachers. They can't teach what
comes to them naturally and unbidden."
"How do you know I can't?"
"Tell me how you defeated Musa."
"I just beat him."
"See?"
"Come on, Alric! Do you want me to give you a blow-by-blow description? You
were there."
"How do you know precisely where a man will be in the circle, Tiger? How do
you know what move he will make before he knows?" He grinned as I stared at
him in surprise. "Yes. I
have seen it in you. As I saw it on Staal-Ysta, in one of the sword-singers
there. I asked him once. He couldn't tell me. He said he simply knew. He saw
it in his head."
"Time just slows." It was the first time I had ever spoken of it to anyone. It
sounded ridiculous. And impossible.
Alric sighed. "You can't teach that, Tiger."
It stung. "You don't know. I might be able to."
The big Northerner snorted. Then he rolled over, displaying a broad back. Such
faith he had in me.
But maybe he was right. Maybe I couldn't teach anyone anything. I just didn't
know what else I might do.
I stared into the deepening sky, watching the stars emerge out of daylight
into darkness.
Firelight flickered at ground level, illuminating soil and sand, the dark,
angular faces of
Southron travelers. The aroma of mutton and sausage drifted our way. I heard
quiet murmurings in several dialects, laughter, a child crying, and a faint,
yearning melody sung softly by a woman.
Page 110
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
Bascha, I said, please don't be dead.
* * *
I awoke to the sound of a baby screaming. At first I tried to block it out by
pulling a corner of the blanket over my head, but it didn't help. Eventually I
gave up, squinted out at the early morning sun, then pushed myself upright.
Musa may have landed only one minor blow, but the dance alone had resulted in
sore muscles.
I got up slowly, swearing quietly under my breath. By the time I was standing,
I realized
Alric was already up. In fact, he'd taken the horses off for watering. I was [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]